I Could Not Ask For More....

Love is an interesting thing. Sometimes it feels incredible, and sometimes it is the most painful thing one can experience. Sometimes people fall in love extremely quickly, and other times love develops over months or even years. The only thing I've experienced as a constant with love, is that it is unpredictable.

Take for example, my dearest husband. He and I are fourteen years apart. He is extremely practical while I'm obscenely abstract. He is incredibly organized, where I'm naturally a bit cluttered. He makes plans and I make emotional decisions. If anything, one would probably look at our relationship and judge that a complete lack of normal compatibility logically dooms us to a bitter end. But what I find interesting about this love, is that it makes me want to compromise. It makes me desire to be judicious in my decisions. It makes me desire to continue evolving into the man I didn't know I want to be, but do so desperately now. Conversely, I hope and believe that the love he has for me keeps him a little more spontaneous than he would have otherwise been. I hope that when he looks into my eyes he feels like making some stupid decision that we'll both end up paying for in the future, but it doesn't matter, because we're doing it together. I hope that I am able to make him feel appreciated, needed, respected, and utterly desireable in every way imaginable, because he is.

At the same time, the reality of our love is that sometimes I'm an asshole. I'm often self-obsorbed and forget that my decisions are decisions for a family now. I constantly fall short of the requirements, and leave him in the dust to hope that I love him as he loves me. Of this I am often guilty. But I'm also guilty of being in desperate, unfaltering, unequivocable, unrelenting ridiculous love with the greatest, kindest, most beautiful man on the face of the planet. And I am flabbergasted that he has put up with me through the darkest of the dark. I am in awe that I have found a lifelong soulmate that is willing to struggle with me through the valleys to experience the mountaintops. I am the most lucky man alive.

Lying here with you
Listening to the rain
Smiling just to see the smile upon your face
These are the moments I thank God that I'm alive
These are the moments I'll remember all my life
I found all I've waited for
And I could not ask for more

Looking in your eyes
Seeing all I need
Everything you are is everything to me
These are the moments
I know heaven must exist
These are the moments I know all I need is this
I have all I've waited for
And I could not ask for more

I could not ask for more than this time together
I could not ask for more than this time with you
Every prayer has been answered
Every dream I have's come true
And right here in this moment is right where I'm meant to be
Here with you here with me

These are the moments I thank God that I'm alive
These are the moments I'll remember all my life
I've got all I've waited for
And I could not ask for more

I could not ask for more than the love you give me because it's all I've waited for
And I could not ask for more
I could not ask for more
-Edwin McCain